Back in the day, eloping meant suddenly running off to marry a lover without your family’s knowledge or blessing. It was thought to be irrational and shameful, and although the old views of eloping still linger, a lot has changed in recent years.

Nowadays, eloping doesn’t have to be secretive, spontaneous, or private – unless you want it to be. Today, to elope means to marry in an intimate, meaningful, and authentic way. Your focus gets to be on the two of you, rather than societal pressures, anxiety, and unnecessary obligations. Eloping isn’t something to be ashamed of, but is instead empowering. Eloping gives you the freedom to marry however and wherever you choose.

Below are the 6 most common elopement myths

1. Elopements are spontaneous, last-minute affairs.

This simply isn’t true anymore. I tend to book most elopements 6-12 months out and have booked some in as little as a month out on occasion. Elopements are planned and thought out, just as any wedding day would be.

2. Elopements should only include the two of you.

Elopements are intended to create intimacy, so there is no need to keep your loved ones in the dark. If you’d like to include family and friends in your special day, you can have up to 25 guests at your ceremony and still consider it an elopement. More than that, and your day becomes an intimate wedding rather than an elopement by industry standards. Click here for tips on how to tell your family you’re eloping.

3. People elope because they don’t want to invest in a wedding.

In general, people think of elopements as a budget-friendly option for getting married. While that can be true, it’s more of a positive side effect of eloping rather than the reason behind it. Just like it’s possible to have a wedding with hundreds of guests on a tight budget, it’s possible to elope with a hefty budget.

4. Elopements are done quickly and have rushed ceremonies.

While this may have been true years ago, it no longer stands. Your elopement day can be as elaborate and as long as you’d like. The ceremonies themselves last anywhere between five and thirty minutes on average and can include personal touches, such as letters, songs, video chats with loved ones, and more.

5. Elopements are not as special as “real” weddings.

I’d honestly argue that elopements have the potential to be more special than average weddings. Rather than going through your wedding day in a blur putting on a performance, eloping allows you to be more intentional, slow, and relaxed throughout the entire day.

6. Eloping is selfish.

This is a mute argument. Aren’t all weddings and elopements a little selfish? With each, you’re asking guests to travel, give gifts, buy special attire, and devote time to you. Elopements simply narrow the guest list and allow you to have a unique experience that is authentic to you.

In conclusion, elopements are for those who dream of more intimate affairs and a slower wedding day tailored exactly to who they are as a couple. Eloping is about celebrating your love in whatever way feels best to you.

Say your vows before jumping out of a plane, hike up a mountain to say I do as the sun rises, or among candles on a beach at sunset. However you envision starting your life together, rest assured you can do it any way you like.

Start planning your dream elopement